TESTIMONY TIME…

I got no preambles or small talk today.

I’m pissed.

It’s as simple as that.

This has gone on long enough and needs to be checked.

Women should be kept off the mic during testimony time.

Yes… Women!

Yes, I said it!

I thought this was peculiar to my church till I visited my best pal’s father’s church where he was celebrating his 70th birthday.

I got there around noon when I thought the service would be over but it somehow just started.

Just my hard luck.

I don’t blame the Christian women for that.

Neither do I blame Jonathan.

So service starts and my poor tummy is blackmailing me for food. I’m thinking how to survive when they called for ‘Testimony Time’ and asked all those with testimonies to step forward.

Step forward about 3 guys and 13 ladies.

I started having this unpleasant premonition and it all unfolded right before my very eyes!

It’s an established fact that ladies fall over themselves to out-do themselves and it’s so brazen in the house of God.
Ladies wanna have finer shoes than the rest, bigger headgears and all that.
But nothing tops this.

In church, Ladies try to out-do themselves in getting the attention of Jesus!

Yes I said it!

They want Jesus to see their geles (headgears), their jewelries, their faces and their voices.

Yes…their voices.

Testimony Time and I won’t deceive you, every lady has a song for Jesus.

Everyone with a testimony was given two minutes for their testimony and what do the ladies do first?

They spend that two minutes singing a praise song is what!

After the normal praise and worship I must add!

They sing away that 2 minutes and they spend a MINIMUM of 5 minutes to share their testimony/story.

If you’re lucky, you’ll see them rolling on the floor while they sing.

The annoying part is that the next person will now pick up a song to beat the previous singer’s song and on it goes.

If you look closely, you might see a lady looking up her eye-socket to get an song beat the previous singer’s.

Now check this…

13 ladies have a song before they share their ‘testimony.’

5 of these 13 have songs to lead them back to their seats.

It’s just pure annoying!!!

We have places to go and things to do naa!!! Why should we spend an hour plus listening to how you overcame your neighbour who was beefing you?!!!

Then they’ll come back the next week to give you a follow back on said neighbour.

My honest opinion?

Testimony Time should be scrapped!

Most of these ‘testimonies’ are just unnecessary.

Let them write it out and it’ll be printed out in bulletins (If it’s edifying).

Thank you.

______________________________________________________________________________

Don’t forget to comment on this post in the comment section to let me know if you agree or disagree.

You can follow me on twitter @blog_aces and request for a follow back.

I appreciate you all.

Cheers!!!

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5 thoughts on “TESTIMONY TIME…

  1. Imo, testimony could be some sort of encouragement to others, yes pple say unnecessary things especially d ladies but I don’t think it shld be scrapped tho, I’ve learnt a lot from d story of others, how God works and it has helped me.

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    1. @smallie. Sadly enough, there are some testimonies that truly edifies and I can’t fault that. But it bothers me when most of the time, it becomes either a contest or just sheer comedy. It makes light the true purpose of these things. But I really hope people will change.

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  2. You should listen to this “churchless” woman pastor in my church that uses testimony time to preach her own sermons… Its so damn annoying… I second the motion that it should be scrapped and the worthy ones be printed…
    I’m looking forward to your next writeup mate

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    1. @prince. Woman pastor too? Lmao! Na wa o. Make God help us. Thanks for the encouragement. I’ll drop something soon. Maybe a follow up to this one sef. Then a Happy Birthday to you pop man, bro!

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  3. It shouldn’t be scrapped… This is what cN be done.. have a body that receives testimonies submitted in writing.. Announce the testimonies in church , can be done by the pastor or a lead in charge in order to make the testifier feel important. Then call up the testimony of the week If there is anyone worth acknowledging or edifying …

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