Weight Loss Tips!

Hello Peeps! I’d like to wish you all a Happy New Month! Or shld I say,Sweet November? I’ve seen the movie so I’d rather not. I’ll call the reason, “due to Personal reasons.”
Anyway,here I am now coming up with something entirely different… Something I’m sure will benefit everyone that reads this. Don’t know why I have to take this road so please,kindly indulge me… I’ll try and liven up the scenery of this short journey you’re about to take with me.
This blog is about Weight Loss Tips and I’m sure that is no breaking news. I’m also sure you’ve seen enough programmes on TV and read a lot of books and articles in Magazines on how to lose weight. Some even come with a time duration for the weight loss programme (oops,just broke another bed). Anyway,please,ignore all the crap you’ve seen or read because what I’m about to put down is the real deal. I’ll tow the line of the latter programme and give you some tips on how to lose a lot of useful pounds in 3 months or less and Yes,I said it! And just in case you’re wondering who am I to give you these tips or on what authority,I’m proud to announce to you that I’m that guy that have walked to and fro both ends of a measuring scale so many times and I know my onions when it comes to this so trust me.
By the way,pardon me if this write up seems parochial but that is the whole idea.
I’ll be giving you just three (3) tips so here we go:

1)Move to Lagos – From wherever you are all around the world,’Las Gidis’ is the place to be. So many things to get you up and doing and the transportation is a delight. You’ll simply love it and the pounds are gonna drop like an anchor in the river. This is the place where your weight obeys the Law of Gravity. The Gravitational pull is stronger here than in any other place I can think of.
It goes on from here.

2)Live as far as possible from your office: But of course,you just won’t come to Lagos and start counting bridges now,will you. Get a job or a hustle and when you wanna do that,make sure you get work as far away from where you live. Like from the Island to the slums or lowlands. You’d be surprised that having to go to work everyday would simply do wonders for your weight. It even helps in your sleep time and wake up time. It’s really healthy. And don’t just get the kinda jobs you’ll just sit your ass down all day like a banker,get the kinda jobs you’ll have to go out to get this,thrash that out,you know what I mean now so stop looking like you’re clueless or something.

3) Watch what you eat!: This is real important,folks. You just don’t go around sinking your teeth into every morsel you find. Oh No! This is how it should go; skip breakfast,work your socks off and when you close say like 6pm,grab a gala (you’ll find like 20 different types these days),get a cold drink and enjoy your long ride home. When you get home (it should be pretty dark then),take a shower and collapse in bed. You can wake up the next morning to start the routine all over again. You’d be surprised at your fitness after 3months.

*sighs* there we are. If you can follow these 3 tips of mine,I can guarantee that within 3 months,you’ll lose at least 10kg or you can ask for your money back.
You won’t appreciate that amount of Kg until you convert it into Pounds which is 22Pounds! Try converting that into Naira and by my calculation (grabbing a calculator) that is erm… wait o… N5,500! Now dat should stock up your refridgerator. Hehehe…

Anyway,glad to help,folks! You can all thank me later. *grabbing my mars chocolate* Adios!

@blog_aces.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

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